The whole afternoon at Cafe City
Miska persuaded to sign a statement that he was only clerk with us, not insurance and the father would not be obliged to pay the big supplement payment for his insurance.
Lecture “the ugly”, a story yet to be disordered, the first chapter is more the storage space of a story.
Collectors from Linz, Kubin recommended, 50 years, giant, tower-like movements when he is silent a long time, bend your head because he completely silent while speaking not quite speak, his life consists of collecting and copulate. Now he is a recognized expert on this pilgrimage medals from all parts come asking for determination and assessment of these medals, his voice is true. Moreover, he also collects anything yet, his pride is a Virgin Belt Who has been issued and all his amulets on the Dresden hygiene exhibition. (Now he was just there and can pack everything for transport) Then a nice knight sword from Falkensteiner. With a bad attainable only by collecting clarity it behaves art. From the cafe at the Hotel Graf he leads us up in his overheated room, sits down on the bed, so we that we make on 2 armchairs around him, a quiet gathering. His first question “Are you a collector?” “No, only poor lover.” “That does not matter.” He pulls out his wallet and pelted us with a formal stamp, own and others, mingled with a prospect of his next book, “Magic and superstition in the stone kingdom.” He has already written a lot, especially about “motherhood in art,” the pregnant body he considers the most beautiful, he is most comfortable to fuck him. Also on amulets he wrote. We need to put something in the pedigree of a friend, he has taken on the journey to make it complete. Before he read it with a wooden voice. I write:
u jump in the dance. s. w.
Since we can not agree with and what he means, not even guess. That, however, is not. Good, but some melodious sound it has. He is a friend Half. He would like to talk about him. We much prefer to lead. About the but is not much to talk about, he is suffering in Munich literary societies due. Smut disregarded by his wife, who as a dentist had visited a studio and got him he is divorced, his daughter 16 years, with blue eyes blonde is the wildest girl from Munich. Kubin married life is poor His wife is a drug addict You watch him just as he made the greatest vivacity suddenly with a pointed nose and cheeks hanging forfeited shall be woken up with a rouse… finds this week, after a break is stopped, what then is repeated at ever shorter intervals he too often missing words – About women:.. the stories about his power to make a thought about how he might be large element slowly into the Women stuffs. His feat in former times was women getting tired so that they could not. Then they were without a soul, animals. Yes this devotion I can imagine. he loves Rubens wives as he says, but says those with large top bulging down flat, baggy sagging breasts. He explains this preference so that his first love such a woman, a friend of his mother and the mother of a classmate was that led him to 15 years. He was better in languages, his colleague in mathematics, so they got together at the home of colleagues, as it happened. He shows photographs of his favorites. His present is an older woman sitting on a chair with her legs apart, arms raised, wrinkled face of fat, thus indicating their meat masses. Very productive Carnival in Munich. After the registration office come to only can copulate during the carnival over 6000 women unaccompanied by Munich apparently. There are married, girls, widows from all over Bavaria, but also from neighboring countries.
The telephone and telegraph wires around Warsaw are supplemented by bribes to a perfect circle, a defined area, forms a kind of court within the meaning of the Talmud from the city, so that it is also the most pious possible on Saturday within this circle to move small items (such as handkerchiefs) with them at all. Increased the entertainment or the one not involved, indemnify you with singing. Melodies invented a successful be called in family members and reviewed with them and studied. A miracle rabbi, who often had hallucinations, recessed in such a conversation suddenly his face in his arms down on the table and remained so under general silence 3 hours. When he woke up he was crying and was wearing a brand new funny military march before. This was the melody with which the dead angel just had accompanied to heaven the soul of the deceased at the time in a distant Russian city of wonder rabbis.
“The love of an actress” “A Teater”
Always the education of the girl, her adulthood, becoming accustomed to the laws of the world had a special value for me. Then run one who knows them only in passing and would like to talk volatile with them, not as hopeless stand out of the way, they remain a bit even if it is not exactly at the point of the room where you want them, you does not have to keep with looks, threats, or the power of love, if they turn away, do it slowly and do not want to injure it, then her back has become wider. What you tell them is not lost, they hear the whole question, without that one would have to hurry and answer, though jokingly, but just asked the question. Yes they even ask himself with raised face and a little conversation them is not unbearable. They can be in the work that they have just made, disturbed by a spectator little more, so consider him less, but he may also look longer. Just for dressing draw them back. It is the only time during which you may be uncertain. Otherwise, however, must not walk through streets to intercept at doorways and wait again for a happy coincidence, but we’ve also been told that you do not have the ability to force him. Despite this huge change but has happened to them, it is not uncommon that they with a weeping face come towards us at an unexpected encounter, put your hand flat in our and with slow movements invite us as a business friend to enter the apartment. Heavy they go in the next room up and down, but as we penetrate there, lust and defiance they sit on a bay window and read the newspaper without having a look for us.
The misfortune of the bachelor’s to the environment, whether perceived or real, so easy to guess that he, at least, when it has become the joy of secret bachelor, will curse his decision. He is indeed around with buttoned skirt hands in the high coat pockets, elbows pointed, his hat down over his eyes, a false already Aboriginal smile to protect the mouth as the Pinch the eyes, the pants are narrower than lean on legs is beautiful. But everyone knows what about him can name him what he suffers. He moved formally incessantly, but with the expected regularity. The further he moves away from the living, for he does, and that is the worst mockery, must work as a conscious slave of his consciousness can not express, the more a smaller space is found for him than enough. While the others be they their lives Located long on his sick bed, still need to be struck down by death, for if they had long been a matter like this from his own weakness, they still stick to their loving strong healthy marriage relatives, he, this Bachelor resigns from his own will apparently been the center of life in an increasingly smaller and he dies, the coffin it is just right.
The weight of fists on the arms felt light on my body before going to sleep.
Even more, I believe that is taking place in me something that that Schiller’s transformation of affect is very close in character. Just think of the main effect of a Jewish operetta, which is that the prima donna marches with a train of little children behind him through the crowd to the stage.
Max spent the last written by me lots not like, anyway, because he looks for the whole thing as not fitting, but possibly also in and of itself considers bad. This is most likely because he warned me before writing such a long bodies and considers the effect of such a letter as something jelly-like.
To be able to talk to young girls, I need the nearness of older people. The they pose little disturbance enlivened me the call, the demands on me seems to me toned down the same thing I did not checked out say of me still can, if it does not apply to the girl, be appropriate for the older person from which I even if it is necessary, to get help in quantity.
Miss. Haas. She reminds me of Mrs. lead, only her nose looks in length, lightweight double bend and relative narrowness of how the corrupt nose of the woman lead from. Otherwise, however, also has them in the face a little outward founded blackness that can be driven only by a powerful character in the skin. Broad back, far advanced annex to the swelling wife back; heavy body, then in the well-cut jacket is thin and narrow for this jacket is still loose. After fixes in conversation is a free lifting of the head that a solution is found. I was not even on the floor in this conversation, had not given up inside me, but I would have seen only from the outside, I would not be able to explain my behavior differently. Therefore a free expression with new acquaintances I could not come earlier because unconsciously the presence of sexual desire prevented me from now prevents me from her conscious deficiency.
She wore her maid dress from the “wild man”. If I like it I then dissect their appearance on the trench had in the details, it is unlikely. (I saw her only briefly, because I was terrified at the sight of her, did not greet them, was not seen and dared not equal, turning round me.) The summer wore his hat with the brim forward depressed. When I turned around she was gone. I guessed that she had gone to the Kafe Central, waited a bit on the other side of grave and was lucky after a long while to see them come to the window. It was not quite clear whether T. with the dog only joked about him and his wife neglected or whether he himself was seriously attacked by the dog or whether he ultimately wanted to stop the dog from us.
Benjamin Finger – Headspincrawl (reprise)
With L. on the quay. I had a slight my whole being oppressive fainting, pretext, and it reminded me a little after him, as of something long forgotten.
Even if I disregard of all obstacles (physical state, parents, character), I get a very good excuse that I did not limit myself in spite of all the literature, the following dichotomy: I can as long as nothing venture for me as long as I have brought no more, I completely satisfying work about. However, this is irrefutable.
I have now and had a great desire afternoon, just write out all my anxious state from me and as he comes from deep in the depths of the paper into it or write it down so that I could fully include the writing in me. This is not an artistic desire. As today Lowy spoke of his dissatisfaction and his indifference especially against what the troops do, I put his condition as an explanation, according to homesickness below, but gave him a certain extent this declaration is not out yet I had uttered them, but kept them to myself and enjoyed it temporarily for my own sadness.
“The candy production belies its absolute value of time”
So. I must go visit my sister and her little boy. As yesterday the mother by 1 clock at night from my sister came back with the news of the birth of the boy, my father moved in a nightgown through the apartment, opened all the rooms, woke me up the maid and the sisters and announced the birth in a way when the child was not only born, but as it has already done an honorable life and had his funeral.
Only later it may be surprised that those strange living conditions are described in spite of their vividness immutable in the book, even though we think we know, in our experience, that of an experience as it is such. As the grief over the death of a friend, nothing in the world more projecting than the description of this experience. But what is right for our person, it is not for the other. If your own feelings we can not meet namely with our letters – of course there is a mutually blurring amount of gradations – if we in our best condition always expressions must help themselves, such as “indescribable”, “unspeakable” or a “so sad “or so nice to be a rapidly crumbling” that “clause follows, as is given to us as a reward for the ability to conceive foreign reports with quiet precision, to its own letter writing we lack at least to this extent. The ignorance in which we find ourselves about those feelings, which depending on once have prepared the letters stretched or creased, just this ignorance is mind as we are forced to free the underlying letter to keep us believing only what the fact is, this so perfectly expressed and find their way into the human element into it to see open by a perfect expression as it is only fair. Thus,. B. Karl Stauffer’s letters contain only the report on the short life of an artist
A dog lay me on the body, a paw close to the face, I woke up, but had a little longer fear to open their eyes and to see him.
Incorrect scenes of the office chief. Loading the skirt between the legs when she bends over. Insolence of the comedian to the piece (pulls his old sword, hats confused) My cold pain. Home Gone, but already there sitting with the admiring idea that as many people take for an evening so much excitement to be (one screams, stealing is stealing, harassing, applauded neglected), and that in this piece when it only with blinking eyes look as much disordered human voices and exclamations are thrown together. Beautiful girl.
“The tailor as council” with the Jews. Bad piece of judges. The Lovers Gold can not read, her husband must study with her. How likely once a bachelor, with his grades are also expressed at midnight the piano player through the door.
The essence of my tone-deafness is that I can not enjoy continuous music, only here and there arises an effect in me, and how rare is a musical. Of course, the music heard attracts a wall around me and my only permanent musical influence is that I locked up, am different dates. – Such deference as the music does not exist in the literature audience. The singing girl. Many of the mouth was held open only on the melody. With a clumsy body flew neck and head while singing. Played. Tragic Overture. (I hear only slow solemn once here once there steps performed. Instructive to observe the transition of music between the individual groups of players and to verify the ear. The destruction in the hair of the conductor).
What is certain is that I still I stood above me in often together resounding literature quite some time, apart for three days from the general desire for happiness feel no desire for original literature. I also thought Lowy last week for my friend and indispensable lacked him three days now easy.
I prefer when I start to write after a long time, as the words out of thin air. If one won, then just only this one is there and all work starts again
My father made me lunch accusations, because I do not care about the factory. I explained that I had involved me because I expected to win, but I could not participate, as long as I was in the office. The father quarreled again, I stood by the window and said nothing. No sooner had I exposed this idea closer observation, he was not amazing and seemed quite used before. I talked me off the ability to take advantage of all the time for literature. This conviction was, however, only a momentary state, but she was stronger than this. Also at Max I thought as to a stranger, but he in Berlin has an exciting read-aloud and foreplay tonight; now it occurs to me that I only thought of him as I approached the home of Miss. Taussig me to the evening stroll
Walk with Lowy down by the river. One of the pillars on the Elizabeth Bridge is collected inside of an electric. The sharply defined areas of light green to the side of the bridge.
Sun. 12 clock noon. The morning wasted sleeping and reading newspapers. Anxiety complete a review of the Prague daily paper. Such fear of writing always manifests itself in the fact that I no occasion be the desk, entrance sets the inventive about writers, the same as useless, dry, abandoned well before the end turn out and show their protruding breaks in a sad future.
The ancient arts on the Christian market. Two cockatoos on a crossbar draw planet. Errors. A girl gets a mistress prophesied.
The young pipes while singing. The only gesture game of r. Forearm bowled back and forth in the joint, the half-open hand opens a little further and then pulling back together. The sweat covered his face, especially the upper lip like shards of glass. Volatile a button-less plastron is tucked behind the vest of the final coat. – The warm shades in soft red of the mouth of the singing woman Klug.
Headspincrawl (reprise) is an unreleased outtake from Benjamin Finger’s forthcoming (as yet unmastered) LP. You can download his earlier work from Bandcamp.
(gif is Franz Kafka head – mechanical statue by David Černý)