Monday, January 31, 2005  9:50 am 

Origin of the Greasys

We get to hear and see a lot of weird bands at xxjfg, actively seeking them out for you is part of our job!

One of the oddest species we have encountered over the past few years is The Pink Grease.

This normally shy and retiring creature can be seen skulking into the second hand shops of Sheffield in search of more outlandish plumage, or the second hand electronic shops or the same area picking out vintage and broken pieces of technology which it uses to grafts borg like into it’s flamboyant call to mate. This territory of Sheffield has previously been inhabited by other great monsters such as The Human League, Pulp, Def Leppard, Heaven 17, The Fat Truckers and as such has proved a prime breeding ground for exquisite and rare creatures.

Closely related to the now extinct early Roxy Music, a hybrid of the English Glam Rocker and Prog Rock band, The Pink Grease and The Evil X was first known to exist in the early part of the 2000’s.

Encouraged in growth by renowned Pink Grease breeder and collector Barry 7 of Add N to X and his Horseglue Records The Pink Grease has since displayed in many venues and gained fans including the almost as outlandish Liars who described Pink grease as the oddest band they had even performed with, high praise indeed. The NME hate Pink Grease, which xxjfg also considers a tribute of the highest order but leaves the creature on the verge of destruction without the much needed acclaim it deserves.

Once in an area of display The Pink Grease transform into an outlandishly coquettish darting menagerie.

Pink Grease Stuart (no relation) is perhaps best known for his colourful displaying ass shaking, bass shooting and crowd surfing.

Steven black drag queen Grease is equally able to impress with his remarkable impersonation of Gene Simmons, he doesn’t even play a guitar, he plays a fucking machine gun with his afro!

Nick Mad Scientist Grease invents his own machines of aural delight and torture based on aliens from Dr. Who’s and Delia Derbyshire’s leftover knitting patterns (Alien’s knitting patterns that is, Delia didn’t knit - just helped with the patterns for scarfs in a maths kinda way, and the Docor knitted them), never the like of which have been seen on this planet before.

John is genetically engineered from a piece of sting and old free jazz saxophone player, Marc Grease keeps them all together almost (no mean feat!) while Rory screeches with elegance and a foul mouthed panache not seen since the original New York Dolls (pre drugs and death).

The Pink Grease talks like hormonally overloaded teenagers reading too much IceBerg Slim with a constant hard-on. Ruder then Snoop Dog eating out with Millie Jackson. Musically they rawk as loud as The Cramps with The Contortions breaking in from the next door (like the Walk this Way video). The Evil X Greasers are as mean sounding as those wonderful Tubes girls on a night in with Little Nell. Yeh, it’s a bit of a racket, but we love that shit!

This would all make The Pink Grease seem a ridiculous and laughable bastard of The Sweet having a knee trembler with Cabaret Voltaire on a dark night if it were not for the real truth, soul and power of belief of its own existence it exudes in every breath. The Pink Grease is challenging in equal measures of both bad and good taste. It has a vision beyond most creatures wildest hallucinations of what a rock and roll band could be, and should therefore be revered for its oddness.

This is The Nasty Show, from the 2003 ep Pink Grease All Over You, lick it up baby, lick it up..

Pink Grease - The Nasty Show

There is no English band hotter than The Pink Grease live at the moment. Anyone who reckons they can take em, let us know!

(Off to see Controller.Controller and Death From Above 1979 now, wish us luck, hope eardrums still work tomororw)

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