The world is in great danger, evil clones march on from music-boxes everywhere, like most boring common denominator chrome wasps ready to sting the spirits of the youth and turn them into mindless cool-obsessed drones willing and happy to devour the latest glossy fad churned out by the entertainment factories, music becomes another fashion accessory for getting laid, tis the most dreadful outcome of a post-modernist approach to cultural ‘production’ based on an eternal rehash of the old and a pathological aversion to excitement and risk, it’s a very boring and grim world out-there if you don’t tune in to the frequencies of the underground, dear people, read and listen on if you dare…

These is a soundtrack to our super-heroic revolution

Splatterguy

If you looked inside Clyde Dextrous’ bedroom, you’d think he is just another robogrindcore-obsessed teenager, and you’d be right, but there’s more! Clyde’s brain isn’t normal! Yes dear reader, exposure to Gamma Red radiation split it into 8 mini-brains, his nervous system works like a herd of synaptic cats sending him into as many directions at once, trouble when he uses the toilette in the morning, fun when he dons the Splatterguy mask by night and goes out to smash and confuse the forces of boredom with atonal whistling, banshee shrieks, a prog-punk one two and so many changes in tempo you’d think he’s a walking maraca, Mean Reads blast away in his walkman while he fights the good fight.

Mean Reds- Gardens and Lifestyles

From their gloriously paradoxically ‘On the one hand they don’t give a crap, but on the other hand, Mean Reads are very careful and precise are they ninjas?’ album, ‘Together, at last, and this is our Wedding’, buy it and get inside the schyzozone.

A kid and his Unicorn

Everything changed for Declan McStrange after he played that Gay Against You tape in a customised dayglo stereo, trying to make sense of their impossible combination of playful overexcited synth spirals, somersaulting ghostbusting mechano-beats and sweet melodic pop insanity after eating too much vanilla ice-cream must have created a hole in the space time continuum bringing Rodrigo the Unicorn from the mythical forest where he was frolicking straight to his bedroom, just over that fancy rug, ever since then him and Declan have become pardners in a hysteric struggle for fun, wigglin’ and running around wearing cardboard costumes, dare you follow them in their crazy adventures?

Gay Against You- teleRAD

Yep, you have to buy Gay Against You’s Muscle Milk, released by Adaadat, because it’s the coolest thing we’ve listened to for a while, we will have them playing live at thedoclub soon, ah, *shudders* (with excitement).

il Mago

Suave dilettante Giorgio Ogi was driving his Buick across the Palm Spring Desert when a cloud kidnapped him, yes, how or why did it happen no-one knows, what’s sure is that by the time his flight had ended, Ogi was a different man, somehow the soothing solar radiation, the bluer than blue liquid sky enveloping him like a Tangerine Dream serviette, and a slow mo panoramic view of California, all enjoyed while listening to the Sorcerer’s enigmatic kosmische funk disco changed him, and the understated beach bonfire of these beautiful swirling melodies still burns in his heart, he’s become il Mago, and he fights for peace and harmony with his blissful trance inducing powers.

Sorcerer- Pocket Change

Isn’t this just lovely, just thank Sorcerer.

Bruno and Dippy

You will laugh, cry and jump for joy with the adventures of Bruno and his moody pooter Dippy (formerly known as DPM75006), yes, you heard right, a computer! You thought they couldn’t be fun? Think again dodo! But then Dippy ain’t your regular data processing machine, no, after being hit by a massive power surge she decided to stop helping the Military Industrial Complex with its calculations and go A.W.O.L., Bruno, a geeky code monkey expert in the DEVO programming language rescued her from the online poker server where she was temping, and now they fight for computer lib together, when they aren’t arguing or listening to Bodenstandig 2000 and dreaming of sweet pixelated electric sheep.

Bodenstandig 2000- Pogos Abenteuer

Bodenstandig 2000 are hard rocking scientists and this tune is from their lovely Maxi German Rave Blast Hits 3 comp, released by Rephlex records last century. It brings to mind many happy memories and we think you ought to buy it. Thanks to our beloved Genuine Guy for the tip.

Pablo el muerto

Pablo el Muerto was your regular zombie, you know, he just went around minding his own business, eating a brain from time to time, and collecting flowers. In one of his errands he ended up trapped in a library at night and, starving, he decided to start eating books, all those thoughts (brain’s output, remember) poured in ink and paper must have somehow altered his mental physiology, and given his unlife some purpose. He walks slightly faster now, only eats shit bands’ brains (or what’s left of them, not much usually) and has started a little commune in the beach, him and his dudes do the mashed potato and the crusher to los Muertos Vivientes when they are not fighting Surf Nazis.

Los Muertos Vivientes- El Diablo, el mas chingon

Los Muertos Vivientes dress up in Mexican Wrestler mask and play this surf punk thing that makes my hips go all wiggly, dance like an electrifried corpse to their album ‘Adelante Muertos’

In ancient times, hundreds of years before the dawn of history, an ancient race of people…

Les Georges Leningrad

When I was only a youth, traveling alone in a city to the East, called Montreal by the people who live there, I came upon a grey rock carved with three strange symbols. It stood as high as a man, and as wide around as a bull. It was firmly in the ground, and I could not move it. Thinking no more of the carvings, save that they might be the work of a king to mark some Ancient victory over an enemy, I built a fire at its foot to protect me from the wolves that wander in that regions and went to sleep, for it was night and I was far from my village, Brighton. Being about three hours from dawn, I was awakened by some mumbling in a patois language uncommonly loud and close at hand.

The fire had died to its embers, and these red, glowing coals cast a faint, dancing shadow across the stone monument with the three carvings. I began to make haste to build another fire when, at once, the grey rock began to rise slowly into the air, as if it were a dove. I could not move or speak for the fear that siezed upon my spine and wrapped cold fingers around my skull, there stood Poney, Bobo and Mingo.

Les Georges Leningrad- I’m too Sexy

Text above adapted from, erm, the Necronomicon, oh yeah- Les Georges Leningrad are the most exciting hardest hitting ranting & raving & somersaulting dance machine ever to leave that crazy arab Abdul Alahzred paralysed in a fit of gibberish and screaming, here they have a deliriously fun go at that bizarro hit by camp as fuck Right Said Fred, it was released as part of the evernice Tomlab’s alphabet series some time ago.

And this is enough super-adventures for today kids, it’s your turn now, mutate, support these bands, start a band, enjoy a band, do it for the right reasons and inspire those who are listening, we’ll love you for it.

xxx

This Friday it’s the Do!!! We are celebrating Scott aka Genuine Guy & James’ aka King of Dude’s birthdays with lots of party food, and another super-hero the one and only DJ Scotch Egg will be playing live or maybe ‘spinning the record’, we don’t know yet, whatever he does it will be rad because he’s a super-hero and he’s awesome and stuff.

And of course the usual assortment of hits and misses, no, scratch that, only hits from your dedicated Do DJ Gang: off the top of our collective hive mind expect Les Georges Leningrad, Liars, Make Up, Wire, Love is All, Oneida, Wiley, DJ Assault, Pavement, Sonic Youth, Die Monitr Batss, the Goxxip, Numbers, Melt Banana, Help She Can’t Swim, Blood Brothers, Can, Silver Apples, Pere Ubu, The Prats, Public Image Ltd., ESG, OOIOO, Ghostface Killah, Boredoms, Lightning Bolt, Envelopes, The Buffets, Ninja High School, Gay Against You, Glass Candy, Beastie Boys, Butthole Surfers, Chromatics, The Fall and many others….

Come and join us for hours of fun at the Core Club, 10 til 3 or later if you keep dancing like last time (i.e. like maniacs), 5 quid, 4 if you bring a NUS card or flyer, 3 if you go for a drink at Kai’s night at the Penthouse before.

Epilogue -
This post is tagged with Genuine Guy kosmische prog rave