Category Archives: 2 dogs in a house

20jazzfunkgreats best of 2010: Step Up

What vinyl platters could wake 20JFG prematurely from its cryogenic slumber in 2010? What repetitive beats could make its unconscious and partially thawed corpse shuffle towards the nearest dancefloor? What warm-hearted heaters could possibly defrost that heart of stone and illuminate that mind of disillusionment? What songs offered comfort when we were sat down and told that our plan to freeze ourselves in search of a better life in the future, had received some major setbacks? In the year that moved at 60 b.p.m, magic at higher tempos shone like the opening ceremony of the Ark of the Covenant.

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2 Dogs In a House – Scream in the Night (posted 25th June)

Echoes of Mr. Fingers drift across prehistorical plains where the proto-wolves wait 10,000 years to devour us.

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Beautiful Swimmers – Big Coast (posted July 5th)

The soundtrack to Streets of Rage 2 as rerecorded by Shriekback whilst holidaying on Easter Island.

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Brassica – New Jam City (posted August 26th)

Prodigious astral boogie 1st heard in the pastel discotheque of Count Ramulus III, Lord of the Vapour Folk (the DJ wouldn’t tell us what it was but we sneaked a look at the label while he was in the toilet).

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Charanjit Singh – Raga Megh Malhar (posted March 31st)

Humanity’s ongoing search for ‘The Future’ in electronic music was called off when it was discovered in the past.

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Cos/Mes – Gozmez Land (posted November 4th)

A luscious trip into the humid rainforests of Selza-G where the indigenous folk speak only a percussive language based on distant Gamelan mythology.

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Crystal Ark – The City Never Sleeps (posted March 22nd)

This is what happened when you dropped the schematic for that trans-dimensional love-canon on your visit to the druid camp.

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Crystal Ark – The Tangible Presence of the Miraculous (posted November 16th)

This is what happened when they worked out how to build it.

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DJ Nate – Make Em Run (posted July 6th)

Planet Mu gave the Europe a 4-part lesson in how they do things in Juke-Town. From Ramellzian voyages into unchartered arrangements by the younger generation, to telepathic hyperspeed bangers from the seasoned vets – each part served to further bend our stiff upper lips and get that booty shaking like it was Mecha-Godzilla being throttled by King Kong.

DJ Roc – Phantom Call (posted September 22nd)

DJ Rashad – Teknitianz (posted September 16th)

DJ Elmoe – Whea Yo Ghost at Whea Yo Dead Man (posted June 22nd)

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Hunt with a cat – Wrapped in Rope (posted August 13th)

Gary Wallace (Anthony Michael Hall) and his best friend, Wyatt Donnelly (Ilan Mitchell-Smith), are 15-year-old nerds with low social standing at their Shermer, Illinois high school. During a weekend at Wyatt’s house in which his parents are out of town they came up with ‘Hunt With a Cat’, the finest mechanoid basement-acid act in the land.

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Hyetal – Phoenix (New Post)

Between two stratosphere piercing peaks lies a valley shrouded in a synthetic mist: atmospheric and portentous.  Still, no amount of scene setting can quite prepare you for the majesty of those two peaks. “Last song of the night”-of-the-year.

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Hyetal & Shortstuff – Ice Cream (posted January 26th)

Pitch bended celestial ballroom music so good, just hearing the opening takes us five years into the future whereupon we chance on a dank basement club, hear the first few chords of Ice Cream and levitate.

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Jonathan Kusuma – Days are Numbered (posted August 27th)

One of many awesome transmissions from Indonesia this year via Space Recs.  Kusuma opening in a baroque fashion with a mile long procession towards a dark and foreboding tower…before storming it in thunderous style.

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JR Seaton – Azklementyne (12′ mix) (posted August 5th)

The 20JFG specification document genre known as ‘Beatnik Beats’ was created especially for this blazed out intellectual battle of wits between Lil Louis and Artie Shaw.

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Malvoeaux- Targets (posted July 5th)

The moment in Tron:Reloaded where Daft Punk finally remove those helmets to reveal thier unspeakable Teuthidian faces.

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Pagan Future – Ancient Ritual (posted October 15th)

Delicate images from the insecure formation of techno preserved at a lower bpm for us to greater appreciate their beauty.

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Protect-U – Double Rainbow (posted June 10th)

Follow her down to a bridge by a fountain, where rocking horse people eat marshmallow pies.

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Rocha- Hands of Love (Fingers of Sand) (Gatto Fritto’s Menorcan Nightmare Version) (posted March 22nd)

This is what hell wants you to think it sounds like down there, so that you will spend your life robbing banks and not helping old ladies across the road.

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Steve Moore – Zero Point Field (posted october 13th)

This is what it felt like to be the LHC in the moments leading up to the first collision.

OR

It has long been speculated that the observed periodic radial velocity pattern for the K giant Pollux might be explained in terms of an orbiting planetary companion. We have collected 80 high-resolution spectra for Pollux at Lick Observatory yielding precise radial velocities with a mean error of 3.8 m s<sup>-1</sup>, providing the most comprehensive and precise data set available for this star. Our data confirm the periodicity previously seen in the radial velocities. We derive a period of 589.7+/-3.5 days and, assuming a primary mass of 1.86 M<sub>solar</sub>, a minimum companion mass of 2.9+/-0.3M<sub>Jup</sub>, consistent with earlier determinations.

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Valis- Exegisis (posted May 9th)

A 13 piece uniformed funk band named Cameo raided a Government building in 1984. Only 3 of them made it out alive, so they moved to Essex and renamed themselves Nitzer Ebb.

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Parallel Presents Pt II

Here lies the second installment of an occasional series, where we ponder what happens when evolution slips on some black ice, and ends travelling the wrong way on a desolate B-road. Last time we pondered the what-ifs and wherefores of art produced by lifeforms developed in atmospheres different to our own. This time our curiosity gets the better of us and we recklessly alter the course of our own evolution, deliberately dropping a chewing gum wrapper in 10,000 BC to see if we return to a modern world populated by a race of Carnivorous Gumbii, like the eon-hopping cultural tourists that we are. Man is But a Worm. Let’s make some soil.

The first time was an accident. No-one really seemed to notice. Well they wouldn’t, they don’t have any memory of the timeline we just bodged. No memory of a world where the phone boxes red red instead of yellow, where humans beings typed on their keypads fingers attached to hands of approximately 189mm in length, accompanied by 9 others. They don’t remember the way they used to talk, the way words used to sound, thei simplee dunt reemehba.

But we do. And as this Spot the Difference puzzle slowly unravels, we realise, something is most definitely afoot. It wasn’t until we went to our local HMV that we knew we had fouled up for sure. Upon our request for the new Pixie Lott album we were greeted with the kind of look of a zombie on a gameshow who was just asked what the capital of Hungary is. Pretty much the usual reaction from a record shop assistant, but she points to a board on a wall with her conspicuously longer than usual (around 7mm) index finger, and gurgles ‘wee unlee cell thur tohp tehn re-kordz in he-r, taik a looch’.

We take a look. This is not the same top ten we saw before our little inter-rail trip through prehistory.

At number 1 is Stockhausen’s ‘Kontakte’ which according to the shop assistant is the ‘behst celling re-kord uf al thyme’. At number 2 is ‘Silver Apples’ S/T. We ask her what happened to ‘Thriller?’ or ‘Dark Side of the Moon’ and she stares at us as if we are some kind of temporal beings who cannot be detected by the limited apparatus of the human mind.

They were never made.

At number 8 in the chart is Research Laboratory of Electronic Progress, who offer us a parallel take on this timeline’s sonic librarians of the 70s. Coming like a remorselessly lo-fi Advisory Circle, RLoEP hit our KPM fetish button hard. Did you ever have that feeling that you heard and advert for a car that was never invented, filed into an archive that never existed?. Good things are coming to Edinburgh. Look here for the above 7′ inch.

Research Laboratory of Electronic Progress – Did You Ever Have That Feeling?

But what had we done to create this fantastic new world? No-one brought anything back from the past, we sat on no grasshoppers and trod not in any Brontosaurus pap. But there was that one time we went to the Neolithic age and lost our ipod. Surely not?

Hmmm, what if we were to go back again and leave our entire Chicago House vinyl collection and some 1210s there too. What would music sound like when we came back?

2 Dogs in a House – Scream in the night

If Mr Fingers had been born in our tampered-with time-line then we hope that he would have come up with something like ‘Scream in the Night’. Where ancient collective memories of the drifting planes facing an approaching ice age are evoked,  where shadows of the Hieroglyphic Being cast themselves across a terrain that will soon be too barren to support life, packs of still-feral humaniods hunt each other in the encroaching mist. 2 Dogs in a House’s awesome ‘Dog House EP’ is coming very soon on new New York label L.I.E.S. and contains members of projects you may have seen in these pages before.

NOTE TO BLN READERS: Tonight sees the inevitable and unholy union of our 2 Berlin correspondents – Our very own Genuine Guy shall be playing some records at the Tausendisco of beloved Hugo Capablanca and any readers who live in the Hauptstadt are cordially invited….